Découvrez en images le périple parental d’un papa hors du commun

Par le 24 novembre 2016 à 13:36

La complicité que dégage ce jeune papa avec ses filles lui vaut un engouement et un emballement instantané sur les réseaux sociaux. Clémentine et Simon Hooper, ce couple hors du commun qui est suivi par plus de 263.000 personnes, partage quotidiennement sur son compte Instagram, des images qui mettent en relief, et cela au détail prés, la méthodologie d’un encadrement allant de l’éducation au divertissement. Tellement mignon !

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Bed time for the twins is supposed to be a quiet affair so they can relax & drift off, leaving us to collapse into a human shaped heap on the sofa. Of course, that’s not possible when the 2 eldest have decided to start what I’m guessing is a Taylor Swift impression karaoke sing off that involves shouting, wrestling and door slamming. They are directly above us & what we can hear can only described as drunk macho elephants fighting over the mic. There is actually paint coming off the ceiling. Of course when these 2 grow up, they just going to add to the noise. Thinking about buying a flat down the road, i’ll just Skype them from my sound proof room. #elephantkaroke #canyousoundproofyourownhead #whydoeseveythinghavetobedoneatmaxvolume #talkingisalostart #girls #fatherofdaughter #dadlife #instadad

Une photo publiée par Simon (@father_of_daughters) le

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The older girls were still away at dinner time this evening so rather than default to a ‘dad special’ (a pouch of nondescript food, a bananna and a biscuit) , I actually cooked. This is the first time they truly responded to a question I’ve asked and it’s with a NO, followed by laughter. Man, they’re tough critics. It was like a swift baby sized kick to the nuts and my ego. I wanted to shove the bowl right in their smug faces but thought better of it. Kind of sets the tone for the rest of my life I guess. Next time they’ll get bread and water from me followed by a stern look. #nexttimeitsbreadornothing #gordonramseywouldgomental #babykickstomyego #ofcourseiatetheleftovers #dadlife #fatherofdaughters #instadad

Une vidéo publiée par Simon (@father_of_daughters) le

There used to be a time when Fridays nights meant going out drinking with friends and waking up with a hangover that that would require surgery to remove. However Marnie came home today with the dreaded bi-annual « There are nits / lice going around at school » letter, so our Friday nights are now spent carrying out small scale genocide on colonies of unwanted scalp intruders. @mother_of_daughters & I will now spend the rest of the evening quietly observing each other to see which one of us start scratching our heads first whilst mentally cursing all children everywhere. Awesome. #betteryoustartscratchingafterreadingthis #fridaynightarentwhattheyusedtobe #parenting #keepingitreal #nits #dotheyevenhaveapurpose #fatherofdaughters #dadlife #instadad

Une photo publiée par Simon (@father_of_daughters) le

Well that was fun. @mother_of_daughters is away with the eldest 2 so I have the twins. Delilah was up & down last night more than a yoyo who’d necked a crate of redbull. As a dad, I usually have inbuilt noise cancelling and can sleep through an thrash metal gig but last night was something else. The neighbours must have thought I was skinning cats with a wooden spoon at 3.30am – the noise was endless – the kind of noise that cuts through you & drains you of any memory of who you are or what you’re doing until your brain dribbles out you ear. They seem to have forgotten the whole experience and moved on. I’ll just scoop up my eye bags so they don’t drag on the floor. To top it all, the car is broken so I can’t get to my brother’s birthday. A shocker of a day so far. #brainonthefloor #alongwiththeeyebags #brokencar #twins #comehomeplease #parenting #fatherofdaughter #dadlife #instadad

Une photo publiée par Simon (@father_of_daughters) le

The twins now get everywhere at the speed of light and with the silence of a assassin who got an A* in being quiet and sneaky. I took my eye off them for 1 minute and before i knew it they were doing bare handed maintenance on my bike chain. If there’s one thing @mother_of_daughters hates, its oil, and the twins were covered in it. As was the floor. And the wall and the glass doors. The torrent of language that came out mouth turned the air blue. Guess that’s the last time Im allowed to keep my bike inside. I’ll be relegated to the shed with my bike tonight (after bathing the twins in swarfega). Tarpaulin Duvet anyone? #oilalwaysgetsmeintrouble #alot #ninjatwins #ifeeladivorcecomingon #twins #swarfegasavestheday #shedbound #fatherofdaughters #dadlife #instadad

Une photo publiée par Simon (@father_of_daughters) le

It’s cold, wet and dark outside and unless the house is on fire or a famous person has died, no one wants to move from the warm embrace of the duvet, but I may have taken the whole ‘do everything in bed’ too far. This morning, after feeding the twins, I could feel something in the bed down by my feet. I searched around and found the offending item – What is that? A malteaser? An old grape? After an initial taste test (why on earth did I do that first) and further examination, we unanimously agreed it was a small hard poo. @mother_of_daughters accused me straight away, stating I’m ‘getting old’ and perhaps I’d lost bowel control. Cheers. In reality, it was from when I changed the twins in our bed when I didn’t want to walk to the changing mat – but that was 2 days ago. lesson learnt. Also don’t put things in your mouth if you don’t know what they are. #theprincessandthepoo #ilovethetasteofshitinthemorning #notreally #dontputthingsstraightintoyourmouth #dontchangenappiesinbed #imworsethanababy #twins #bed #liein #fatherofdaughters #instadad #dadlife

Une photo publiée par Simon (@father_of_daughters) le

I seem to forget to feed myself sometimes. I can get to 5pm and realise I’ve had nothing other than a cup of tea that’s been microwaved 5 times and has a skin on it that’s thicker than I feel after watching a documentary of dark matter. The twins, on the other hand, get 3 square meals a day spooned directly into their mouths. I tried crouching between them in the hope @mother_of_daughters would feed me too (FYI I don’t have tiny arms) although I was rumbled by Delilah who kicked up a fuss. They have absolutely zero loyalty or compassion for me. Get between these girls & their food and you may just lose a finger. #noidonthavetinyarms #foodoverfathers #arewefeeders #theydontsharefood #nowonderimlosingweight #microwavetea #fatherofdaughters #instadad #dadlife

Une photo publiée par Simon (@father_of_daughters) le

Another monday, another last minute rush to the shops to avoid the armageddon I.e running out of nappies, wipes & baby crack (milk) for the addicts. I basically live in this aisle of the supermarket now. New parents seem to gravitate to me as an « experienced parent » (i.e. the tired looking guy shivering in the corner) and ask « do you know where so and so is please? » My reponse – « Sure 3rd shelf, half way down on the left hand side, buy 3 & get a discount,although you want to use that in combination with blah blah blah. » I’m like a walking encyclopaedia of baby product info. I used to use my brain to solve global corporate wide problems. I now use it to calculate bulk buy discounts. #ishouldgetanamebadge #bogofking #iliveherenojoke #dadbrain #lifeinthefastlane #fatherofdaughters #dadlife #instadad

Une photo publiée par Simon (@father_of_daughters) le

Is it only me or do all men learn to sleep on an 8 inch strip at the edge of the bed? Irrespective of the size of the bed, or how many people are in it, I always find myself relegated to the ‘man zone’. I’ve become so used to sleeping on this limited area of bed real estate, that I’m confident that I could sleep on top of a wall & not fall off. On the other side of the bed (the promised land), @mother_of_daughters sleeps like a star fish all night long, kneeing me in the back and generally complains about me coming to bed too late, being too cold or my foot encroaching onto her territory. At least the bed’s nice and warm, even if the reception isn’t sometimes! I hope that next Sunday, on #NationalLieInDay, I’ll not only gain another hour in bed, but more space – but it’s doubtful ! If you want to regain that hour (and some space for that matter) click in the link in my bio, loads of great prizes to be won @SimbaSleep #bedrealestate #livingontheedge #girls #twins #daughters #therestoomanygirls #fatherofdaughters #dadlife #instadad #gopro

Une photo publiée par Simon (@father_of_daughters) le

Clemmie gave me a pretty simple job this evening – « go pack the baby bag » (we’re going away for a night). A plan developed in my head (why can’t I take anything seriously?!) I called her in – « well you said pack the baby bag!! », expecting a laugh. She didn’t. I then suggested cutting holes in the bottom for their legs to hang out like those dog carriers but @mother_of_daughters was already less than pleased that i’d used her prized leather @kerikitbags for lols, so with my tail between my legs, I repacked. A shed load of nappies, baby crack (milk powder), toys they won’t play with & a monitor – There was still enough room for half my family in there! #bottomlessbabybag #mobiletwins #howmuchstuffdobabiesneed #fatherofdaughters #dadlife #instadad

Une photo publiée par Simon (@father_of_daughters) le

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